The biggest lesson from my trip to Russia

Starting this morning with Raffaello.

It's not an advertising. It's a celebration!!!

Celebration to be back at home, with my loved ones, in my/our own energy. It's a lot to be grateful for.

Past 12 days spent in Russia have been tough for me in many ways. And the biggest lesson is:

"Do anything necessary to create the right conditions for what you need wherever you are."

It happened such that I could not sleep a single night there because of the airco heating and because Alisia was waking up each night several times. And I thought "Ah well, we will get used to it". But we did not. And so the more nights have passed, the more unstable I became internally. And only after leaving and sitting at the airport in my own energy it hit me "What the f.ck?! Why did the thought to move out to a hotel hasn't even crossed my mind!? Why did I choose to endure and allow the confusion to take over?" It didn't for some reason and it's ok.

Looking back, I'd rather have stayed in a hotel near my parents, even though it's not something that is culturally done and could be misunderstood. They have their own energy, rythme and habits and, in combination with sleepless nights, it just really did not work with my sensitive nature. It's the first time I visited them in winter, and it felt like there was no place to escape. It was pretty cold outside, and usually I'd spend most of the day in nature there, just even in the garden. This time we were stuck way too long inside and it impacted me on many levels. I started becoming the worst version of myself - angry, irritated, impatient, with lack of clarity and literally just confused. Even some illnesses got activated, besides flu. Exactly the states I refer to when humans live not their own life, but the life of conditioning.

It's not about them, my parents. It's about me and taking care of my needs. Without compromise. Anywhere.

Now I'm 1000 times more grateful for life and for everything I have created, after the experience of the past 12 days. So even if it was just a reminder of what could have been my life if I chose to follow my conditioning in all areas of life, it's worth to have experienced it.