I like working with controversial things. I like working with conditioning. I like to have a good laugh when people share with me what they imagine happens in my retreats.
People who touched on my work sometimes ask me: "Would not it be better to not call it Tantra? There is an opinion out there that Tantra is all about sex and group sex. But it's not what happens in your retreats."
"Sex", "group sex" - this is what the West made out of Tantra. It linked Tantra to Sex. Especially when neo-Tantric schools (like TNT and some others) started encouraging sex and group sex in their programs. Nowadays, erotic massage salons who have no understanding of Tantra like to use this fancy ancient name and call their services "Tantra Massage". :-)
Last year it all blew up when several schools and teachers who encouraged sex in their programs and brainwashed their students to have sex with them have been exposed as abusers. It was a huge public happening. I am on the one hand happy it happened because things became public who to stay away from. Yet, it did not contribute to already questionable reputation of Tantra in the West.
In my retreats, there is no sex, and there is no group sex. That's not what Tantra is about. Practicing Tantra can improve your sex life for sure, but it's not what Tantra is about. Tantra is a path towards self-realization, towards realizing your divine nature. It happens through various practices, including some that employ work with sexual energy. But none of these techniques require sex.
It's very important to understand.
In my retreats, I use Tantric wisdom in application to various aspects of life, mainly zooming into ourselves and building the foundation for sustainable self-love. We also focus a lot on relationships and intimate life, because it is the foundation of healthy personal relationships. We can learn so much from Tantra to have a great intimate life in the long term.
I was careful to choose my Tantra teachers in the past, because I wanted to learn authentic Tantra, and not the poor interpretation of someone who was obsessed about sex. I was afraid to be abused by teachers in whom I'd put my trust.
And I'm grateful to the teachers who came my way. Only one of them turned out to be unethical in the end, but I could recognize it early enough and it taught me to trust my gut above any external authority. This is the red line of my teachings today - learn to listen to and trust your inner voice.
When I started teaching Tantra, I had to make a choice if I use the word "Tantra" as part of the name for my company. I was aware I'd need to face the damaged reputation created about Tantra in the West. But I still chose to call it Tantra. Because I stand for the purity of this ancient path, with all the wisdom it reveals for us in this modern day and age. And I committed to contribute to clearing the reputation of Tantra in the West.
Some people ask me:
"Don't you have participants who get disappointed when they do your retreats and suddenly realize there is no group sex?"
I laugh.
"No. They get so much more than group sex.
They get to realize their Divinity and open up to God (call it Love, Truth, Consciousness)."